A Two-Part Investigative Report

PART 1

Palantir Expands 'Neurodivergent Fellowship' Benefits to Include On-Site Stimulant Dispensers, Sensory-Friendly Zyn Lounges

'We don't ask for diagnoses. We don't gatekeep. If you need it, it's there,' says HR

DENVER—Just weeks after announcing its Neurodivergent Fellowship recruiting program, Palantir has unveiled an expanded workplace accommodation package that includes Adderall dispensers in all restrooms, complimentary Zyn pouches in the cafeteria, and what the company calls "focus optimization stations" stocked with modafinil, sources confirmed Tuesday.

"This is no different than providing glasses for employees with vision differences," said Palantir Chief People Officer Rebecca Hartwell during a press briefing. "Some people need corrective lenses. Some people need 60 milligrams of mixed amphetamine salts to meet their sprint deadlines. We accommodate both."

The program, which Palantir emphasized is "not a diversity initiative," provides what internal documents describe as "cognitive accessibility infrastructure" across all office locations. Employees can access stimulants via badge tap, with no prescription verification required.

"We don't gatekeep neurodivergence," Hartwell explained. "If you feel you need pharmaceutical support to achieve hyperfocus, pattern recognition, and the inability to sit still that we explicitly recruit for, who are we to demand documentation?"

A leaked facilities memo revealed the full scope of accommodations:

• Restroom Dispensers: Adderall IR (10mg, 20mg, 30mg), Vyvanse (40mg, 70mg), and "Chief's Blend" (contents unlisted, developed personally by Dr. Karp)
• Cafeteria Stations: Complimentary Zyn (citrus, mint, "Classified"), sugar-free Red Bull on tap, and what employees call "the Chandelier"—a rotating display of international energy supplements not yet FDA approved
• Focus Pods: Soundproofed rooms with adjustable lighting, white noise generators, and a locked drawer requiring two-factor authentication that employees described as "where the real stuff is"

Former employees described an environment where pharmaceutical enhancement was implicitly expected.

"During onboarding, they asked about my 'optimization stack,'" said one engineer who requested anonymity. "I thought they meant my tech stack. They meant what I was taking. When I said 'just coffee,' my manager suggested I 'explore my options' in the third-floor wellness center."

The wellness center in question contains no yoga mats or meditation cushions. A photograph obtained by The Finer Print shows a single poster reading "THE WEST WILL BE SAVED BY THOSE WHO CANNOT SIT STILL" above a vending machine accepting both USD and Bitcoin.

Palantir spokesperson Peter Todd defended the program's philosophical underpinnings.

"For too long, society has seen the traits we recruit for—hyperfocus, non-linear thinking, 72-hour coding sessions—as things to be mitigated or medicated," Todd said. "We've simply removed the 'mitigated' part. The medication stays. The stigma goes."

When a reporter noted that the fellowship's listed traits—hyperfocus, pattern recognition, inability to sit still, thinking faster than one can speak—precisely mirror the effects of stimulant use, Todd paused for eleven seconds before responding.

"I think you're conflating neurodivergence with its pharmacological approximation," he said. "But also, so what if we are? The cognitive output is identical. We don't discriminate based on whether excellence is innate or acquired. That would be gatekeeping."

Medical ethicists expressed concern.

"They've created a system where the job requirements are the side effects of Schedule II controlled substances," said Dr. Patricia Mendez, a bioethicist at Georgetown. "And then they provide those substances on-site, no questions asked. It's like if a company's job posting required employees to be seven feet tall, and then the break room had a rack."

Dr. Mendez paused. "A stretching rack. From the medieval period. I need to be clear about that."

Palantir's fellowship has received over 3,000 applications since expanding the benefits package. Internal data shows a 340% increase in applicants listing "ADHD (self-diagnosed)" and a 89% increase in those describing themselves as "neurospicy."

CEO Alex Karp, who has dyslexia and has spoken publicly about his own neurodivergence, personally interviews all final-round candidates. According to sources, his standard opening question is: "What does focus feel like to you, and how do you get there?"

"Dr. Karp isn't interested in the diagnosis," one successful applicant explained. "He's interested in the methodology."

At press time, Palantir stock had risen 4% following the announcement, with analysts citing "reduced healthcare costs through workplace distribution" and "alignment between recruitment strategy and product."

PART 2

Karp Defends Neurodivergent Program By Praising Nazi 'Workplace Productivity Innovations,' Insists 'You Can't Dismiss Everything'

'I'm Jewish. My family fled. So I can say this,' CEO explains

PALO ALTO—Palantir CEO Alex Karp sparked controversy Wednesday after defending his company's stimulant-friendly workplace policies by citing the Third Reich's methamphetamine distribution program, arguing that "historical atrocities shouldn't blind us to orthogonal policy innovations."

The comments came during a wide-ranging interview on the "Moment of Zen" podcast, where Karp was asked about criticism that Palantir's Neurodivergent Fellowship amounts to institutionalized pharmaceutical optimization.

"Look, I'm going to say something that will be taken out of context," Karp began, in what sources confirmed was not taken out of context. "I'm Jewish. My family fled the Nazis. I have moral standing on this issue that most people don't. So I can say: the Third Reich did terrible things. Obviously. Terrible. But."

The host, visibly uncomfortable, attempted to interject.

"But," Karp continued, "their workplace productivity research? The Pervitin program? Methodologically, it was ahead of its time. You can't just dismiss everything because of who did it. That's not rigorous thinking. That's pattern-matching, which, ironically, is exactly what the neurodivergent are better at than you."

Pervitin was the brand name for methamphetamine tablets distributed to German soldiers and factory workers during World War II to enhance endurance and focus—a program historians have extensively documented as causing widespread addiction, psychosis, and death.

"The implementation had issues," Karp acknowledged. "Obviously. The dosing was wrong. The context was wrong. But the core insight—that pharmacological enhancement of cognitive workers increases output—that's just true. We've known it since 1938. We've just been too squeamish to operationalize it in peacetime."

Palantir's communications team immediately released a statement clarifying Karp's remarks.

"Dr. Karp was making a nuanced epistemological point about separating historical atrocities from orthogonal policy innovations," the statement read. "He is not pro-Nazi. He is pro-focus. These are different things. See our forthcoming white paper, 'Moral Unbundling: A Framework for Extracting Value from History.'"

The statement continued: "It should also be noted that Dr. Karp's family were victims of Nazi persecution, which provides him with unique moral standing to identify the specific operational elements of the Nazi regime that were bad (genocide) versus those that were merely ahead of their time (workplace optimization)."

Historians contacted by The Finer Print were unanimous in their assessment.

"This is like saying 'the trains ran on time,'" said Dr. Eleanor Vance, a historian at MIT. "Except he's saying it about the meth. And he's saying it approvingly. And he's personally providing the meth."

"I've studied Nazi pharmaceutical policy for twenty years," added Dr. David Kaufman at the Holocaust Museum. "Never once did I think someone would cite it as a 'best practice' in an HR context. I was naive."

The Anti-Defamation League released a statement expressing "deep concern" about Karp's comments, while simultaneously acknowledging the complexity of his position as a Jewish CEO of a company with significant defense contracts.

"We condemn any positive framing of Nazi policies," the statement read. "We also note that Mr. Karp's family history is genuine, his dyslexia is real, and Palantir's contracts with the Israeli defense establishment complicate our usual response framework. We are consulting with our Nuance Department."

The Nuance Department, reached for comment, said they were "still working through the flowchart."

On social media, reaction was polarized. Critics accused Karp of "Nazi apologia with a prescription pad," while supporters argued he was being unfairly attacked for "engaging with history on a first-principles basis."

"He didn't say the Holocaust was good," wrote one defender on X. "He said the meth was good. These are different pills. Literally."

Karp himself responded to the backlash in a follow-up post:

"The neurotypical reaction to my comments proves my point. You hear 'Nazi' and your pattern-matching shuts down. The neurodivergent hear 'Nazi' and ask: what can we extract? What's transferable? What's the delta between the implementation and the insight? That's why they'll build the future and you'll just be upset about it."

He added: "Also, Pervitin was methamphetamine. We offer Adderall. Completely different molecule. Well, similar. But different. The point is we're not Nazis. We're Palantir. We help democracies. With surveillance. It's different."

Internal Slack messages obtained by The Finer Print revealed employee reactions. One channel, #neurodivergent-fellowship, showed the following exchange:

@marcus.chen: did anyone else just see the podcast @jennifer.wu: i'm going to pretend i didn't @marcus.chen: he cited the nazis @jennifer.wu: he cited the nazis @marcus.chen: as a POSITIVE EXAMPLE @jennifer.wu: of our BENEFITS PROGRAM @alex.torres: to be fair the cafeteria does go pretty hard @jennifer.wu: ALEX @alex.torres: i'm just saying the zyn selection is unmatched

When asked whether the controversy would affect recruitment for the Neurodivergent Fellowship, Palantir's Peter Todd said applications had increased 47% in the 24 hours following the podcast.

"Turns out a significant portion of our target demographic appreciates what they're calling 'Based Historical Analysis,'" Todd explained. "Their words, not ours. We're just glad the discourse is driving engagement."

At press time, Karp had announced a new internal initiative called "First Principles History," described in a company memo as "a rigorous examination of historical programs and policies to identify extractable innovations regardless of their originators."

The first session is titled: "What the Romans Got Right About Infrastructure and Public Execution: A Nuanced View."

Editor's Note

When The Finer Print attempted to contact Palantir's Neurodivergent Fellowship participants for comment, we received 47 responses within 11 minutes, each between 3,000 and 7,000 words, several of which included original patent applications for "focus optimization devices" and one of which was a complete screenplay.

All respondents noted they were "not currently sleeping" but were "fine" and "had never felt more productive."

One participant's response simply read: "I have solved P=NP but I can't stop organizing my desk."

A Palantir spokesperson later clarified: "This productivity is exactly what Dr. Karp envisioned when he said the neurodivergent would save Western civilization. We're just providing the environment—and the molecular support—for their genius to flourish."

The spokesperson then excused himself because he had "a thing in 90 seconds" and had been "awake for a very normal amount of time."

This has been a two-part investigative series by The Finer Print's Workplace Optimization Desk. Tomorrow: "WeWork Announces 'Entrepreneurial Psychosis Fellowship' For Founders Who Haven't Slept Since 2019"